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笑一笑:海龟版多收了三五斗
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话题: 笑一笑:海龟版多收了三五斗
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笑一笑:海龟版多收了三五斗 8 年, 9 月 之前 评分: 8  
长江小三峡的河埠头,横七竖八停泊着北美农村出来的敞口船。船头坐着的是新出炉的北美萎缩男,后面的箱子里是各种各样的证书,MBA, EMBA, MFE, CPA, CGA, CFA, CA, ACCA……把船身压得很低。齐船舷的莱叶和垃圾给白腻的泡沫包围着,一漾一漾地,填没了这船和那船之间的空隙。河埠上是仅容两三个人并排走的街道,招聘现场就在街道的尽头。朝晨的太阳光从破了的明瓦天棚斜射下来,落在招聘单位的彩旗上,迎风飘舞,谷歌,波士顿咨询,西门子,国际四大会计师事务所,中石化,外交部国际司,中
金国际,摩根斯坦利战略投资处。。。

那些戴学位帽的MBA们,大清早摇船出来,到了埠头,气也不透一口,便向刘翔一样来到柜台前面占卜他们的命运。“谷歌15000,波士顿咨询 14000,西门子8000,四大5000,中石化3500,外交部2800,中金国际和摩根斯坦利只要太子党,Part time谁也不要” ,HR的先生有气没力地回答他们。

"什么!"MBA们几乎不相信自己的耳朵。美满的希望突然一沉,一会儿大家都呆了。

"在2006年里,你们不是说美国海龟Top10 MBA年薪50万么?"

"100万也招过,不要说50万。"

"哪里有跌得这样利害的!"

"现在是什么时候,你们不知道么?各处的海龟象潮水一般涌来,过几年还要跌呢!"

原来出力申请犹如赛龙船似的一股劲儿,现在在每个MBA的身体里松懈下来了。2000年的时候,都说土鳖不值钱,出国到英国读MBA,2001年的时候,说英国的再牛国内都不认,转手申请美国再读,2002年的时候说国内只认美国Top10,别的都是白念,于是再跳Top10,2004年毕业的时候打算海龟,却说没有美国工作经验的不要。于是在美国大公司又忍辱负重干了3年,哪里知道临到最后的占卜,却得到比国内售楼小姐更坏的课兆!

"还是不要干的好,我们回美国去吧!"从简单的心里喷出了这样的愤激的话。

" 嗤,"小姐冷笑着,"也就看你们有个美国的名头,这offer土鳖MBA打破脑袋还干不上呢。中国到处都是海龟,仅上海就有10万之众,每年以35%的速度递增,有几个能进谷歌BCG这样的外企,有几家公司能有中石化外交部这样旱涝保收?你们不干,人家就关门了么?各处地方多的是海龟,哈佛耶鲁的本科,杜克斯坦福的生物PhD,普林斯顿的Master of Finance,滥校毕业回来的太子党,哪个不比你们强,今年金融形势不好,上周又有几批华尔街的矿工lay off回来了。"

Ivy League的本科,太子党。。。那都是遥远的事情,仿佛可以不管。而已经学出的MBA不回国,却只能作为一句愤激的话说说罢了。怎么能够不干呢?光两年 10多万美金的学杂费,借下的债总是要还的。更致命的是这么些年来,满脑子都是哈佛那套General Management,满脑子都是那种领导几百上千号人帮助公司处理各种危机和战略的case,不回国哪有这样的平台呢?现在祖国各地的的房价,人民币兑美元的速度,都是像做了火箭一样往上涨,而美国萎缩男工资的上升幅度,远远赶不上国内物价和工资
增长的速度。在美国找个长得过得去的传统中国mm死心塌地跟你过日子,比把公司做上市还难,整日蜷居在Dreamer和饭米粒跟大妈调情靠爆料和骂外F女宣泄不满终究不是个出路。中国的工资虽然差,但是上升的空间取决于你的想象。如花似玉的mm遍地都是,股市也是欣欣向荣。年薪100万的好日子自己也知道一去不复返了,外派和global pay已经是遥远的传说。这些年回来的海龟越来越多,越来越牛,越来越有背景,眼看自己岁数一天天奔三,老爸老妈也渐渐变老,再不回来就真的回不来了。明天还会有一批敞口船来到这里停泊,小三峡的招聘市场上每天都在表演着同样的故事,明天这几家公司说不定都不要你了。。。想到这,MBA们屈辱的签了合同。

这种故事也正在中国别处市镇上表演着,真是平常而又平常的。
 
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